It’s my 40th birthday today! Here are some of the highlights of my day so far.
Cooper made a cameo today in the hilarious comic strip Scary Gary by Mark Buford. Thanks for the shout-out, Mark!
And this morning my wife had the whole kitchen decorated with “40” baloons and decorations, as well as pictures of me from the past posted all over the refrigerator. I’ll share a few with you.
Here’s me at age four. Despite the haircut, clothing, and circa 1958 Buick in the background, I assure you this picture was taken when Richard Nixon was president, NOT vice president.
Here’s a picture of me and my sister one year later. No mistaking what decade this picture was taken in. Not with my white tie/belt combo and “No Country for Old Men” haircut. It also helps that my mom scratched “1975” onto the front with a ballpoint pen. Oddly, It looks like she added a copyright symbol above the date too. Good thinking, Ma. That way nobody can use this image of your children sitting on a giant bandana without your express written permission.
Tasty Treats, anyone? I’m not sure what toy that apron and hat came with. I want to say it was the Snoopy Snow Cone Factory, but I can’t be sure … and what’s going on with my crotch?
Ah, 1977. The year of bad shirts and even worse haircuts. But one really awesome thing did happen that year …
STAR WARS! I like to think this picture was taken the night after we finally saw the movie at the drive-in, because the expression on my face totally indicates that I’m reliving the whole experience in dream form. And thanks again to my mom for writing our address on the front of the picture, so I’ll never forget the street, town, and state I grew up in.
But now it’s time to move on to darker times. Here I am in my red jumpsuit right after my gymnastics recital in 1979. Our all male team tumbled around on the floor, then straddled each other in a circle for the finale. All to the song “Macho Man” by The Village People. Absolutely nothing gay about that.
But the private shame doesn’t end there! Here I am in 1982 with my mom and her boyfriend in full costume on our way to the “Doctor Who” convention in Denver. Thank God somebody took a picture, because otherwise I might have been tempted to deny it ever happened.
Let’s shoot forward a few years to 1986. Let the catcalls fly, ladies! For your viewing pleasure, teenage Norm is showing off his ultra-smooth Barbie doll legs with a sexy pair of short shorts! I’m even showing more leg than my sister! I don’t remember borrowing her ®Nair, but this picture seems to indicate otherwise.
Here’s a slightly cooler picture of me in 1987, rocking a “Billy and the Boingers” t-shirt and high-tops. I only included this one because of the Bloom County reference, not to show off the opulent luxury I’ve always enjoyed. Good breeding taught me to eat a Pop Tart gingerly, so as not to drop crumbs on the lavish couch that doubled as my bed.
Here I am a decade later in 1995, on one of the first dates with the girl I would eventually marry. Man, look at that hair. So thick and lush …. WHOA, gas was only $1.32 a gallon!!!
And last but not least, here I am in 1997 marrying the beautiful woman who has made my last 13 birthdays very special. I love you, Jen.
Alright, I’m off to enjoy my first official day of being old. Have a great day, everyone! Hope you enjoyed the pics!